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Serving a community of private individuals and professionals
who have the desire to cultivate a life of clarity, compassion,
and creativity. We warmly welcome our new subscribers. Thanks
for joining! Your feedback is encouraged. Please feel free to
contact us.
Dear Pure Heart, Simple Mind Readers,
Let me thank you heartily for writing and letting me know
how our newsletter helps you move closer to the life you want
for yourself. Your appreciation means a lot and inspires me
to further commit to helping clients recognize and embody their
true heart's desires.
Wherever you live, you can get even more from Seishindo if
you consider joining our
telecourses and taking some new steps on your way to a better
life. Please come join us in our friendly and supportive community.
Warmly,
Charlie
* * *
"...For the first time in my life I feel love for myself.
My somatic intelligence has done its work, and this is
an exciting process! Something has really changed. And
after all of this, I find myself feeling healthy, without
pills or any special supplements, for the first time in
many years."
Corry Brons, Belgium
1. Appreciative Relationships Help
Resolve Conflict
I witnessed a beautiful scene the other day that epitomizes
the way many Japanese approach conflict and relationships. I
share this story with you now, hoping it will help you better
deal with conflict in your own life.
A rather old man who lives in my Tokyo neighborhood came shuffling
along on his way to go shopping. He stopped and talked with
a girl of around 5, who was playing by herself in the parking
lot of my apartment complex. It was obvious by the animated
nature of their conversation that the man and the girl knew
each other well. After talking for a few minutes, the old man
reached in his pocket and pulled out a candy bar which he offered
to the girl. She bowed and accepted the candy with little hesitation.
The old man smiled, bowed back to the girl, and continued on
down the street.
The interaction between the two led me to understand the girl's
mom must have OK'ed receiving a gift from the man in the past.
Otherwise the child would have likely said "No thank you"
as Japanese people are usually quite hesitant to accept a gift,
even from a good friend.
Just as the girl began to eagerly tear off the candy wrapper
her older brother and his friend came along.
Upon seeing the candy, the brother quickly decided all three
of them should share in the girl's bounty, so he took the candy
bar away from his sister and began to think out loud about how
to split it up. He and his friend quickly started arguing over
who should get what, as the girl stood there and began to cry.
I was tempted to somehow intervene, but I thought it might not
be wise to do so. Chances are a big foreigner like me might
only scare the children, even though I had said hello to them
many times in the past.
The noise of the arguing boys and the crying girl drew the
mother's attention, and she soon came out of her apartment to
see what was going on. It didn't take her but a second to size
up the situation, and she took the candy bar from her son and
gave it back to her daughter.
The mother gently but sternly scolded her son. She said, "Not
only were you treating your sister badly, but you were teaching
your friend bad manners as well." The son bowed to his
mother, offered his apologies, and then bowed and apologized
to his sister as well. The other boy was quite embarrassed and
stood there staring down at the ground.
The mother squatted down and drew her daughter to her side.
She asked if everything was OK now, and the girl said "Yes."
Next, the mother said, "Even though your brother has been
quite naughty, it's still better to share what you have with
others, rather than keeping everything all to yourself."
Still a bit teary eyed, the girl slowly nodded her head "yes"
as she stood there with the candy bar in her hand. She asked
her mom if she should give some candy to both her brother and
his friend, and her mom said, "As an act of kindness it
would be a very nice thing to do."
The girl divided the candy equally between herself and the
two boys, even as the boys once again apologized for their bad
behavior.
Such is life in Japan!
To me it was a beautiful example of how to resolve conflict
by building relationship.
* * *
If you're having difficulty achieving the goals you've set
for yourself, please consider engaging in some coaching sessions
with me.
If you drop me a line and let me know what you want to accomplish,
I'll let you know if I think I can help.
Charlie@seishindo.org
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